The New Normal: 5 Ways To Maintain the Bond You Built With Your Children During The Lock-down
- October 26, 2020
Life is back on track and the new normal isn’t what we thought it was going to look like. I find it infuriating that people think COVID-19 has packed up its baggage and gone to where it came from! Everywhere I look people are not wearing masks, parties are rolling out and I’m the strange one with my face mask!
Hey don’t think I don’t have a life or I got complacent with the lock-down; that’s not what happened at all. All I am asking is a little more caution out there in the streets, at work, at events and at the malls. To all my Khyra lovers, please keep maintaining social distance, use your face mask everywhere you go and keep washing those hands. Don’t get tired of doing any of these three as your life literally depends on it.
I had to digress a little because this is quite related to this blog post. I’m writing this for every parent who formed a strong bond with their children during the lock-down. You and your child (children) connected more than ever during those few months of lock-down. I had cause to appreciate the stay-at-home order (yes indeed) because I rediscovered my kids, I saw their growth, observed who they were becoming, piqued at their interests, spent time teaching them the family culture and much more. And sure they saw a new ‘mom’.
Children are attention seekers and affection hoarders. It doesn’t matter how “grown-up” they seem, all they want is to feel loved and seen by their parents. In this blog post, you’ll learn how to always make your child feel exactly that way. I know you’re a busy parent and working hard to raise your kids might be extra challenging but these are your kids and the best you can do is to find genius ways to spend time with them and show them you love them. I have kids too and I know how much of a work it can be sometimes. I used to wonder how “Parents of the Year” do it. They seem to have everything figured out and their kids are just perfect. Here are the little secrets I have discovered in my parenting journey. Hope you find them useful.
The Little Things
You might not be able to take your children on a trip to Disneyland but kids aren’t bent on extravagant displays of love. Of course, children love wonder and traveling is one great way to expose them to the different climes, lifestyles and cultures that exist. But I noticed that my children were happier when I make their breakfast daily with cheer on my face. They care that I ask them how they are doing with online learning and how school is going. They care that I didn’t forget to log in to the PTA meeting. They are excited that I remembered their birthday (we had one during the lock-down). They care that you believe in them and you care for them. Children may say the dumbest things but they have the purest hearts. For the children; it’s the little things that matters the most.
Start Family Traditions
One of the highlights of my childhood is my family tradition. I’m not referring to my cultural heritage now. I’m talking about what my parents and my siblings did for events or just for us. We had new year traditions, Christmas traditions, Easter traditions, extended family traditions and so many others. The thing is we didn’t sit down with my parents to formulate these practices. It kind of grew on us. We had a tradition of preparing our Christmas lunch by ourselves (dad included) and then eating together on the same table. Everyone joined in the cooking!
You can do the same with your children. Have something that your family does for holidays, special days, birthdays, children’s day. To do this successfully and ensure your children love to be a part, you need to observe what it is they love doing, what holidays are important to them and their mind set about certain societal cultures. For example, if your child thinks there should be parents day instead of having Mother’s Day and Father’s Day separately; organize a family Parent’s Day.
Teach them how they can show that they love and appreciate you when the day comes. Let them use their natural talents to show appreciation and celebrate holidays at home.
Involve Their Strengths
Every child is gifted in some way but it’s only parents who pay attention that would help their kids realize their gifts. If one of your children loves cooking and chores; let them lead the family in that category. If another loves organizing and administration, let them join you as you make plans for the home and for their needs teaching the others how to stay organized and tidy.
If you have a child who loves art work; let them paint and hang their works around the house and during family time; let them teach everyone about painting. Ensure you give them the audience they need! When you involve your children’s strength in the affairs of your home; they connect with you because you are watering their possibilities. They would definitely love to talk to you, lean on you and open up to you.
Listen to Them
Never be too tired to hear the same story repeated yet again. Don’t shrug of a long face! A lot could be going on for all you know. Share your own troubles, it gives you a human face. Ask for contributions from them for problems that they can understand and deal with. Chat them up online, share jokes, swap stories, video streams and much more. Celebrate their achievements, appreciate their failures, see the world through their own eyes even if it’s for a day. Get down to their ‘level’. Don’t forget to still remain the loving but firm parent you are!
These are four simple yet pivotal ways to ensure that you and your children keep the bond stronger and continue to grow together despite the busyness of your individual lives.
Before I go into the tips and tricks to maintain that momentum you’ve built with your children is that you need to instill these COVID-19 practices in them. They need to practice it especially when you’re not there. They need to learn the principle of hand-washing so much that you could tell them to chill out. Now that you’re back to the office, your kids get home to their nannies or a family member watching them or even themselves; make sure you enforce hand-washing as the first thing to do when getting home. Personal hygiene has to be taken more seriously than before especially if you have younger kids who have most probably touched anything and everything.
Children are attention seekers and affection hoarders. It doesn’t matter how “grown-up” they seem, all they want is to feel loved and seen by their parents. In this blog post, you’ll learn how to always make your child feel exactly that way. I know you’re a busy parent and working hard in Nigeria to raise your kids might be extra challenging but these are your kids, there’s no excuse for not knowing them, spending time with them and showing them you love them. I have kids too, I know how much of a work it can be sometimes. I used to wonder how “Parents of the Year” do it. They seem to have everything figured out and their kids are just perfect.